Wacky Wedding Planner

Name Change After Your Wedding

I came across a frantic post from a newly married bride who was seeking assistance from "anyone" who could help.  She was recently married and leaving for her honeymoon. However she made a major mistake and one that could jeopardize her trip.  She booked her reservations in her new married name before she had legally changed her name.

She was now frantically contacting the county she was married in to get the status of her marriage certificate so she could begin the name change process.  As much as I understand the excitement of taking your husbands name, she should have been patient and waited until after her honeymoon to start using her new name. 

Modern day travel by air, train or cruise ship is more difficult than ever and to have your travel documents such as passport, driver's license or Visas reflect conflicting information guarantees you'll be bumped out of the security line and sent packing back home.  And it's become even more difficult as of October, 2009 with the advent of birthdates, middle names  and gender being required.

So to those ladies who can't wait to use your husbands last name, be patient, make the change legally and then enjoy your future together as Mr and Mrs.  Otherwise you may just end honeymooning at home.

Look for name change documents and requirements from your local county office and be certain to check and double check all spellings before booking your travel. If you need help, call me at Fete Perfection for more information.

Happy Trails...Amy

I Should Have Had a Wedding Planner!

I found this collage on Bridal Canvas and couldn't help but laugh.

AHHHHHHHHHHH, I should have had a wedding planner by jenniferborghevents

Brides who hire Fete Perfection never look like this, thank goodness!

Destination Italy - part II

My travels to Italy were a resounding success having located three venues for the three events my destination couple is hosting next September, 2010.  We specifically looked for a restaurant for the first evening event which we call the "welcome to Italy" dinner.  The following afternoon we're off to wine tasting in the Chianti region and finally the main event, their wedding in a castle dating back to 1000 AD - wow, what a dream venue.

We concentrated our search to only two medieval towns in the Tuscany, Siena and San Gimignano and ended up in the San Gimignano area. 

Here's the view of San Gimignano from my hotel room.

This is another view from my hotel room on our last day.

Their version of a farmers music right in the central square of San Gimignano.

Here's one of the castle's we considered but didn't book.
And here is the castle that will be the wedding venue next September, 2010.

Enjoy the photos and please let me know if you are considering a wedding in Italy or other European country, Fete Perfection can help you locate and plan the destination wedding of your dreams.

Weddings in Italy

I recently returned from touring wedding venues in Siena & San Gimignano, Italy and want to share my experiences for wedding planning in the Tuscany Region.  This was an incredible experience for not only me, but the couple who is planning their 2010 wedding.  The advantages are limitless and the options are many. 

1. History and architecture in most of Italy which cannot be found in the U.S.
2. There are very affordable yet exotic venues such as villas, castles, wineries, private estates or hotels and restaurants with character and ambiance.
3. Family owned properties versus corporation owned means personalized service and attention.
4. Breathtaking scenery
5. Affordable, delectable menu options
6. Fabulous wines and olive oils
7. Friendly people who speak the most beautiful language in the world
8. Numerous options for accommodations
9. Less need for elaborate designs and decor since the setting itself is dramatic and stunning
10. A wedding in Italy will be an event to remember for couples and their guests

I'll post some of my favorite photos in the next post but in the meantime, if you have ever considered a destination wedding in Italy, contact me, Amy Rubins Certified Destination Specialist at Fete Perfection.

Choosing the Best Caterer

My team and I have the opportunity to work with many different caterers during the course of wedding planning.  Sometimes couples are fortunate enough to choose their caterer and sometimes they're stuck with an in-house caterer.  From my perspective, caterers can make or break a wedding.

Granted food quality is the number one priority for everyone however service ranks right up there in the number two spot.  Couples assume service is fairly standard from caterer to caterer and this is where problems can arise. Good service is expected but not a guarantee and when we encounter a caterer providing sub-standard service my team jumps in to cover what is lacking.

Let me provide examples of situations we have encountered and what we did to bridge the gap.  A budget caterer provided a tasty buffet of Italian food at a very affordable price.  However the caterer also provided minimal staff which meant the buffet was often understocked and guests waited in long lines. Catering staff would not serve alcohol in any form - in other words they would not butler pass wine or champagne immediately following the ceremony, nor would they pour wine for guests during dinner. The guest tables were a mess once meal service was over because the catering  being woefully understaffed ran behind clearing plates, silverware etc.  The same caterer did not cut and serve wedding cake.  Fortunately for my bride and groom I learned ahead of time about their alcohol and cake policy so added my own additional staff to make up the shortage.  My team at Fete Perfection butler passed wine and champagne to 200 guests immediately following the ceremony so these same 200 would not have to stand in line at the bar. We cleared dishes off the guest tables, cut and served wedding cake and ran food from the kitchen to the buffet so guests were not feeling as though they were in a cafeteria.

At another wedding we coordinated, the catering staff packed up and left shortly after dinner service, even though the reception was several hours from completion.  No one bothered to tell me they were leaving which was my first clue they knew they shouldn't...Apparently they thought since dinner was over, their job was finished and were not at all concerned with who would clear tables, glassware and dishes of leftover cake.  My staff covered the rest of the evening so our couple and their guests weren't left to wonder why the room was a disaster.

Under staffing seems to be the common denominator with under-performing caterers.  At another reception with multiple food stations, plates and forks were frequently out.  Guests were left standing at the stations to put food on napkins.  When we see these things happening we jump in to help with whatever we can - after trying to locate a server and finding none, I jumped into the prep area and began  loading up on plates and forks to restock the stations.  One of the servers happened to see me and snapped that he would take care of this.  I explained that I would help him since two out of four stations were completely void.  Rather than thank me he yelled that he didn't need my help.  I was stunned...he clearly needed my help and yet was indignant about accepting it.  That same evening the banquet manager came over and berated me and my staff for "helping" and implied its not our job and that we are to enjoy ourselves at the wedding.

She was right about one thing, technically stocking food stations, clearing plates and keeping guest tables clean isn't our job, however if the catering staff isn't keeping up, then it becomes our job.  I'm going to dedicate another post to asking the right questions when choosing a caterer and if your wedding is at a venue that doesn't allow flexibility of choice, what questions to ask and clarify when working with that venue.

Frankly, working with the right caterer has the biggest impact on your reception and since close to 45% of your entire budget is dedicated to the reception this is not an area for mistakes or misunderstandings.

Advice for New Wedding Planners

Debbie Orwat of Save The Date Event Planning in Colorado posted a great blog today.  She has advice for new wedding planners or those wishing to explore the business of wedding planning.  I endorse her advice wholeheartedly. Thank you Debbie.

Idea for Marriage Proposal

I don't usually open my junk mail let alone read it, however I was in a reading mood this weekend and while sorting through mostly junk I came across information from Gondola Romantica which offers "authentic" gondola rides in romantic settings.  I did a little research and discovered their gondolas are imported from Italy and are as authentic as those used in Venice.

They offer a variety of options for cruises on the St. Croix River in Stillwater or Centennial Lakes in Edina.  Short of traveling to Italy, I can't think of a more unique or romantic way to propose or celebrate special occasions.  Check out Gondola Romantica for ideas and pricing. I would love to hear from anyone who has proposed in this fashion either locally or in Italy.  Fete Perfection works with destination couples exploring exotic locations so why not become engaged in Minnesota and travel to Italy to marry?

 

 

Stress-free Venue Tours

Last winter, on what was probably the coldest night of the year, I assisted one of my couples with rehearsal dinner venue tours in downtown Minneapolis.  We had to see five places in ninety minutes.  If we didn't stay on schedule, our site coordinators would have gone home for the evening so needless to say, this was not a pleasant experience.  But from this experience a great idea was born and today I actually implemented the idea, very successfully I might add.

A great new couple I'm working with was on a mission to locate their wedding reception venue before weeks end.  I received word of their mission on Monday and had only Tuesday to tour because I'm leaving for a family wedding on Wednesday and will be gone the rest of the week.  Not wanting to disappoint them, I scheduled six site inspections over four hours all in downtown Minneapolis.  Have you been downtown lately?  It looks like the roadways from the 1800's with dirt, gravel and holes on all the major streets so guess what this does to traffic.  

Needless to say I was a little anxious about staying on schedule, finding parking and seeing all the great venues in four hours.  Memories of winter past came flooding back when inspiration hit - I called my couple and asked they meet at my studio and leave the rest to me.  They arrived at the designated hour and so did my luxury limousine and professional driver complete with refreshments for the occasion.  The moment we stepped inside and settled in I knew I made the right decision.  Hiring a car and driver to negotiate through the construction and traffic was brilliant and the best part, because we were dropped off right in front of the venue doors, our tours were quick and efficient and we stayed on schedule.  In fact we were a little early on some occasions so were able to squeeze in a few extra inspections we hadn't anticipated being able to see.

The most wonderful part however was seeing how thoroughly relaxed my couple was and I think they very much enjoyed the day. Oh by the way, they found their dream venue and they did this in style and with grace.  Thanks to RiverCity Limousine and Karen Trondson for your promptness and flexibility. 

This is just one of the unexpected services Fete Perfection offers to set ourselves apart from other wedding professionals, so if you are considering hiring a wedding planner consider Fete Perfection to exceed your expectations.

Ice Sculpture Centerpieces

I'm always on the lookout for creative and stylish ways to personalize weddings, so when I picked up the July/August issue of Special Events Magazine I was instantly drawn to the idea of individual ice sculptures on guest tables.  Even though the event featured in the magazine was a corporate fundraiser, ice sculpture centerpieces makes perfect sense for weddings as well.

Fete Perfection works with two of the most talented sculptors in the industry and I know if I asked, they would carve creations unique to the couple and the style of their wedding.  Of course the venue would have to be ideal for ice, so backyard tented weddings in July or August, not so.

I would also suggest having ice sculptures as centerpieces on about one third or one half of the guest tables.  Too much of a good thing is not a good thing.  I would suggest a mix of ice with floral and candlelight centerpieces. In addition, ice sculptures should be up-lit which adds drama and depth.

So next time we're either managing a tight budget or stylizing a wedding to fit the design and decor, I'm going to suggest ice sculpture centerpieces.  I think they'll be a big hit and certainly should be remembered long after the ice has melted.

We borrowed these images from the Events Department - thank you.

 

Destination Weddings - Budget Saving Tips

Why do destination weddings typically cost 40% less than the average local wedding?  Because, guest lists are typically much lower than local weddings.  I've had couples invite 150 guests but have 48 to 60 attend. Destination weddings by nature are smaller, intimate affairs and even though there are several events associated with the wedding, the savings can still be substantial.  Here are my suggestions for additional savings:

1. Plan your wedding in the off-season. Hotels and resorts greatly discount rooms to keep occupancy up. Personally, I love summer in the Caribbean because beaches are less crowded, the water is warmer and airfares are drastically reduced.  Great properties are willing to offer complimentary room upgrades as good public relations and wedding couples will often receive VIP treatment.
2. If you really want to leave the cold and snow be flexible with the month and week of your wedding.  For example, once you have narrowed your search down to two or three venues, make sure you let your sales managers know that you are willing to have your wedding during their slower weeks. Spring break or Easter is not slow time for destinations, but shortly after New Years, many resorts see a drastic decline in occupancy. 
3. Have a mid-week wedding.  Why not arrive on Sunday, get your legalities finalized on Monday, host a welcome reception on Tuesday, take a day off and then get married on Thursday?  Room rentals may be lowered or waived and food and beverage minimums are drastically reduced making your dream venue affordable on Thursday but out of reach on Saturday.
4. Use simple local decor for centerpieces - afterall isn't the ambiance for your wedding, the destination itself?
5. Hire live local entertainment.  Typically they charge up to 75% less than bands at home.
6. Make your food and beverage a cultural experience.  Find out what foods & beverages your destination is known for. Both will be more affordable, if it's abundant and easy to prepare.  It certainly will be fresher and offers a genuine local experience to your guests.
7. Wedding groups means revenue to properties.  Negotiate complimentary breakfasts or cocktail hour as an add-on for your guests.
8. Most couples host their wedding at the venue in which they are residing, therefore no transportation costs.
9. Bring your own photographer.  There are many excellent photographers wishing to break into destination weddings and will charge minimal fees or ask that their expenses are paid in order to gain experience and add to their portfolio.
10. Work with an experienced destination wedding specialist who already has all the resources and contacts at their fingertips.  This will save numerous phone calls and frustrations especially if you aren't used to "island" time. Also, they will have researched and read reviews of area destination weddings and can sort out "cookie cutter" weddings from those that truly are one-of-a-kind.
11. Contact the local Department of Tourism or Convention Bureau.  They can provide complimentary maps, entertainment guides and gifts for you to provide to your guests in their "welcome to our wedding" bags.
12. Consider VRBO or Vacation Rentals By Owner for weddings of 10 to 35 guests.  They offer fantastic, private accommodations usually under one roof, complete with housekeeping and private chef services.  These are private luxury homes or villas found all over the world.  I am a big fan of VRBO and have used this resource for my own family vacations.

Most guests appreciate the opportunity to plan their budget so they can make your destination wedding a vacation, so send Save-the-date invitations as early as possible and start working on a timeline.  What's a destination timeline like?  That's next...

Hiring a Wedding Planner - Questions to Ask

This is the first of a series of posts I hope will enlighten you as you plan your wedding.  Liene Stevens of Splendid Communications reminded me just today that education and information is an important aspect to planning a wedding and building trust with brides.  So regardless if Fete Perfection  has been hired or not, I hope that the information you receive from me will be invaluable, even if it's free.

If you have decided to hire a wedding planner for full service planning or day of coordination, scheduling an initial consultation is critical.  If possible, schedule this face-to-face rather than by phone.  There are times this may not be possible, especially if you are planning from another state but I recommend trying to coordinate a trip at the same time you begin your venue search.

Plan on spending a minimum of sixty to ninety minutes meeting.  Bring along a prepared list of questions and have your wedding planning notebook or organizer close by should you need to look for information or contracts.  After introductions, get comfortable and don't be shy about getting down to business. 

A thorough wedding planner will have done their own homework and perhaps may have provided a questionnaire or survey for completion in advance of your consultation.This will help them to know just a little about you before you arrive and hopefully can help to break the ice. I send my Budget Priorities Questionnaire and Bride & Groom Style Survey in anticipation of meeting potential clients so I know a little about them as a couple, their likes, dislikes, food preferences, personalities and budget priorities.

At this point in your consultation are you thinking "I can't get a word in edgewise" or "are you listening to what I'm saying?" If you find yourself in this position, I'm thinking she's not the planner for you.  Your planner should listen to your vision and dreams without taking over the conversation.  Communication and trust will be key over the next several months so building rapport early on is mandatory.

Here's my suggested list of questions to ask a potential planner:

• How many weddings have you planned?
• What do you enjoy the most out of your job?
• What do you like the least?
• Do you handle more than one wedding per day or per weekend?
• Who will be my lead Consultant/Planner.  What happens if they are sick or cannot be there on my wedding day?
• How do you help me manage my budget?
• Do you negotiate pricing and review vendor contracts?
• Do you accept kick-backs from vendors?
• What appointments do you attend with me?
• How many hours do you work on my wedding day?  Do you stay to the very end?  If not, why not?
• Do you belong to any associations?
• Will you be my advocate should I have a problem with a vendor?
• Can you counsel on etiquette and advise on matters of hot trends?

Finally, make sure you feel a genuine connection and that she understands your vision, challenges and budget.  Make sure too that she isn't bossy, critiques your ideas, has no references or will not sign a contract. After the planner has a clear understanding of your needs, she should prepare a proposal and send within 24 to 48 hours.

I hope you find benefit in this post and if you have any questions, feel free to ask.

Sherwood Forest and VADA Photography

My team from Fete Perfection and I were fortunate to be able to plan and coordinate another beautiful wedding at Sherwood Forest in Nisswa, MN.  Sherwood is the fine-dining restaurant owned by Grand View Lodge.  It's close to one hundred years old and so stunning with all its rough-hewn-peeled-log architecture and hand-laid two-story fireplace.

This was a great wedding in that the brides mother had fabulous instincts and design ideas that pulled together beautifully.  We brought linens from Linen Effects with us along with over 600 white chargers and red salad/dessert plates from Aarcee Classic Events. We used granny smith apples and lots of wrought iron and candlelight to pull everything together to complete the look of timeless elegance.

The couple was very adventurous and had all sorts of plans to depart the reception which, unfortunately, dampened the day but not their spirts.  They left in a small float plane immediately following their afternoon reception and flew off into the wild blue yonder.

The best part however was working with  one of my favorite photographer Biff Ulm of Vada Photography.  Biff has an eye for capturing details, emotion and personalities like no other. Click here to see the sneak peak of photos posted on Biff's blog.

We so enjoyed every element of Carolyn and Jeremy's wedding, thank you to the family for giving up the opportunity to be a part of such a special day.

Love, Love, Love...Linens!

Other than traveling for destination weddings and networking events, my last three weeks have been spent selecting BEAUTIFUL linens from my favorite rental companies, Linen Effects and Aarcee Classic Events. Russ Mohr of Linen Effects and Allison Munsell of Aarcee never cease to amaze me with their eye, taste and knack for pulling together fabulous looks even without the benefit of being at the venue or seeing the centerpieces.

Because I work with many brides who want specialty linens and personalized decor, I see a wide-range of selections and looks but no two are ever alike.  Even with the bride whose colors may center around brown and lime green, or vivid orange and eggplant, the looks created by Russ and Allison are completely unique to that bride. 

I'm always excited to attend linen selection appointments and so to better prepare yourself for such appointments, I have my cheatsheet on how to do your homework before selecting linens.

1.  If possible, obtain a room diagram of your venue showing table size, quantity and placement.  This will help to quantify linen needs and color schemes if using more than one type of linen.
2.  Know your budget.  The average specialty linen rents for $35 excluding delivery, tax and installation.
3.  Bring photos or magazines showing colors and looks you like.
4.  Bring fabric or ribbon samples if you are set on specific shades of "insert color here"
5.  Bring your florists proposal.  This will help the designers to coordinate or contrast the looks.
6.  Bring your camera...chances are your fiance will not care enough about linens to attend the appointment, but he will care enough to want to see photos.
7.  Speaking of an entourage, don't bring them.  The more groupies you have, the more opinons you get...afterall isn't that why they're there in the first place?  Bring mom, future mom or maid of honor but leave the rest at home.  Surprise them on the wedding day.
8.  Ask for fabric swatches.  Most companies readily supply samples which you can bring to your next floral appointment. 
9.  Don't be rushed.  Allow at least an hour to look at the various selections and samples provided.  One or two will jump out at you and the rest wil quietly fade into the woodwork. 
10. Finally, savor the moment - the hard part is done.

Darcy Miller of Martha Stewart Weddings...and ME!!!

Oh my gosh, I am so thrilled to be mentioned in the one of the leading wedding blogs of all time, The Bride's Guide by the staff and editors of Martha Stewart Weddings!!!

I had the privilege of hearing Darcy Miller of Martha Stewart Weddings speak this morning at Engage 09.  Who knew I would create such a controversy by asking a simple question "are wedding favors really necessary?"  There were a few boos and hisses from the all-wedding-industry-audience, but Marcy was gracious and so sweet when she replied "of course not" but if the couple truly desires favors and they have a favor that represents the couples likes, personalities or hobbies, why not?

Darcy approached me at the break and said she would like a photo of us together to go with today's blog post.  How could I say no?  So although I received a lot of grief for my question, having an opportunity to have Darcy Miller in my corner was worth it. 

Wedding Cakes

I love wedding cakes and judging by the time spent considering options, my couples do too.  One of the "perks" of my job is the opportunity to meet with very talented bakers and enjoy the fruits of their labor.  Several times each month I join one of my couples as we eat our way through the cities sampling delectable cakes, frosting's and fillings that eventually become the finished product...the wedding cake!

I have my favorites,  but that doesn't matter, what does is how happy my couple is with the samples provided during their tasting.  It seems that grooms are very engaged in the cake tasting aspect of planning and often are quite opinionated, which is great.  I love to see them asking questions and making suggestions.

So here are my suggestions for making the most out of your cake tasting:

1.  Bring photos of cakes you like.  It doesn't matter if you have 15 photos, bring them all.  Be ready to narrow down your selection to your top five and from there your top three.  Try to determine three things you like most about your top three.  For example is it the shape of the cake - is it the height - or is it the designs.  Whatever is drawing you to the cake, single it out if you can and be ready to explain the attraction to the baker.

2. Go hungry - do not go after you just had a full meal.  By the time you have finished sampling close to 25 different cakes you will be ready for a nap and you may never want to look at another piece of cake again.

3. Determine where cake is on your priority list.  If it's high, choose the cake and the baker that exceeded your expectations in every way, even if the cake exceeds your budget.  You can take dollars from another area with lower priority if needed. If on the other hand you view cake as a necessity and feel that all the cakes you tasted were wonderful and you truly cannot make a decision, chose the one that offers the most value.  Cakes range in price from about $3.25 per slice to $10 per slice and a Sylvia Weinstock cake can run in excess of $15,000.

4. Try to limit the tasting to you two, but if mom and dad hold the purse strings, the polite thing to do is invite them along.  One word of caution, the more bodies at a tasting, the more opinions you'll receive. As if tasting approximately 25 different cakes isn't bad enough, trying to get a consensuses among the 4 is torture.  Well it can be...I've seen it.

5. Take notes.  It's virtually impossible to remember all the little details and options discussed during a tasting so make notes of what you liked and didn't like.  Make notes about pricing, delivery fees, deposits and final payments.  If you have a wedding planner, check to see if they will attend and take notes for you. 

6. Finally, enjoy the experience.  Cake tastings can be a lot of fun and once the decision has been finalized you will feel ready to move onto your next task.

7.  Get to the gym as quickly as possible...you'll feel so much better.